Lesson's Of The Heart
by HeavenlyKitten
Summary: When the late Col. Sumner's daughter comes to Atlantis se takes it upon herself to avenge his death by trying to kill every wraith she sees. It's Ronon of all people who shows her there's a better way. Can she find closer before she gets herself killed?
1. Chapter 1

**A/N: **_I had this story p posted else where, but I just got around to putting it up on here. It's taken forever because well, I forgot about it. I hope you all enjoy this. I have another one that I'm also putting up as soon as I can finish it._

_**Disclaimer: I own nothing and no one in SGA.**_

**A Lesson Of The Heart**

"Hello, Dr. Somner." Dr. Weir greeted an average size woman with medium brown hair and deep green who took a seat next to Rodney with John, Teyla and Ronon across from her." Welcome to Atlantis."

"Thank you very much." Nalani said as she smiled nervously." You guys can call me Nalani."

"Well, Nalani I'm Elizabeth Weir, Lt. Col. John Sheppard, Teyla Emmagan, Ronon Dex, and Dr. Rodney McKay." Elizabeth introduced each person around Nalani." You'll be working close with all the people in this room. Have you been off world before coming here?"

"Yes Ma'am I have I've worked with Dr. Daniel Jackson and the SG1 team very closely." Nalani said softly as she got this feeling that someone in the room was starring hard at her. She glanced around and saw that it was Ronon. _He is very attractive. Sexy. Dangerous. Okay Nalani snap out of it. _She told her self as she focused back on the conversation.

"That is good." Elizabeth said" You'll have to go through training physically. I need to know that I'm not sending a female out there without being able to defend herself."

"Understood, but you should know that I was taught from a young girl how to defend myself." she said as she was struck with a pain of sadness." My father thought it would be safer and well I could really use a refresher course."

"You're father was good man." Elizabeth said softly knowing it must be hard for her to be in this place where her father was last.

"Thank you." she said not knowing what else to say as she looked down at her hands.

Elizabeth went on to tell all of them about the mission and give them a warning about possible wraith in the area. Nalani's hair stood up on the backs of her neck. She couldn't wait to be able to kill a wraith after what they did to her father. After the meeting Nalani was sitting in the sparring room waiting for Teyla to train her when the doors opened she saw Ronon. His hands were on either side of the door. The look on his face was pure predatorily. It sent shivers down Nalani's spine.

"Hi, you're Ronon right?" she questioned trying to get him out of the doorway so he looked less threatening.

"Yeah." he said as he walked into the room his eyes never left hers. It was like he was sizing her up or something. Either way she felt uncomfortable, but she wouldn't let it show something her dad also taught her.

"I'm Nalani." she said making polite conversation" I'm waiting for Teyla she's supposed to be training me."

"She can't make it." he said as he stopped in the middle of the room" I'm here to train you."

"Oh, no I don't think that's a good idea someone could get hurt." Nalani said as she took a deep breath and decided not to let him make her nervous. She walked until she was in front of him" But if you insist I'll go easy on you."

This actually brought a smirk to his face." Don't."

"Fine I should call Dr. Beckett and let him know you'll be in to see him." she said as she got into fighting stance her voice the whole time never showed how nervous she was in fact there was a hint of flirtation in it.

A few quick punches and blocks took place just before Ronon knocked her down on the ground and landed on top of her.

"You were saying." he smirked as he stood up. His back was to her and she jumped so quickly to her and onto his back that he almost fell down.

"Ha, now I think I have the upper hand." she said smugly

With a grunt Ronon once again knocked her on the ground, but instead of her landing flat on her back she landed on her feet. Ronon's hand was still gripping her shoulder. She managed to get out of his grip and knock him down on his butt.

"My father taught me that." she said proudly as Ronon got to his feet." Stop taking it easy on me. I'm a big girl I can handle pain believe me."

Ronon just shrugged as he raised his brow at her.

They continued sparring for nearly two hours. Nalani fought better than Ronon expected her to. She looked like a fragile girl, but he was proven wrong. He had to admit she was almost as good as Teyla. In the end Ronon still managed to knock her down. The doors swooshed opened.

"Okay I think that's enough for today." John said as he took in the room and noticed Nalani on the ground he thought that Ronon had hurt her" Don't want to hurt the girl on her first day."

"She's a big girl she can handle pain." Ronon mocked Nalani's earlier remark

"Ha, ha." Nalani said as she lay on the ground where Ronon had knocked her down. She was sweating and breathing hard.

"You need some help?" John asked with amusement in his voice, but also a touch of concern.

"No, sir I got it." she said as she pulled herself up to her feet." I'll only admit this one time Dex you gave me a really good work out." She rubbed her shoulder which was sore. _I needed that, but maybe next time I should stretch a few times. _She made a mental note to herself.

"You're not so bad yourself." Ronon said impressed by her strength, but still a little wary of how good she actually was.

"If you two don't mind I'm going to shower." Nalani grabbed her stuff and headed out the door" Same time tomorrow?" she called to Ronon

"Unless you prefer Teyla." Ronon said as he watched her

"Well if you're afraid of me kicking your ass again." She teased

"For the sake of your body and my stress level at having to explain why you're all bruised up without even leaving for off world I think you should train with Teyla until you get better." John intercepted not wanting her to get hurt to bad.

"You're lucky the colonel doesn't want you to get hurt." Nalani said with a smile as she left the room

"She's good." Ronon told Sheppard as the doors shut

"Really?" John questioned

"Yeah she knocked me down a few times, but nothing I couldn't recover from. I don't know why Dr. Weir wants her to train she doesn't need it at least not right away. It's not like we're leaving off world anytime soon." he said

"It's to reassure her that what happen to her father will not happen to Nalani." John said

"What happened to her father?" Ronon asked as he grabbed his towel to wipe off the sweat.

"The wraith killed him." John said as he left the room

_No wonder I liked her. She has hatred for the wraith almost as much as me. _He thought as he too walked out of the room. He

wouldn't wish what happened to his home and loved ones on anyone. Nalani was someone not like the rest. She didn'tgiggle and blush whenever he walked into a room she actually treated him like a person. He respected her for that. She also intrigued him for not flirting with him or trying to get him into bed. He must be losing his touch. Before they slept together he would differently get to know her better.


	2. Chpt 2

_**Disclaimer I own nothing or no one in SGA**_

**Chapter Two**

"Are all the women around here so friendly?" Ronon asked as John sat across from him.

"No, it's you." John joked as a group of females walked by and gave Ronon a longing look before they giggled and walked away." Most men around here would love to have women flirting with them."

"Give me a strong woman that'll allow herself to be a woman and I'll be happy." Ronon said as he saw Teyla" Take Teyla for one."

This got John's attention. _What could Ronon want with Teyla? Aside from the obvious.'_

"She's a strong fighter and she allows herself to be a woman sometimes, but not all the time." Ronon finished as he then noticed Nalani

"What about Nalani?" John asked feeling the need to get Ronon's attention off of Teyla and on someone else.

"What about her?" Ronon asked as he shoved food in his mouth.

"It just seemed like you two made a good first impression." John said

"I like her she's very good at physical combat, but there's something in her that stays guarded." Ronon said as Teyla and Nalani headed over toward them.

"What are guys talking about?" Nalani asked curiously as she sat down across from Teyla who was sitting next to Ronon.

Nalani caught Ronon's eye and flashed him a beautiful smile.

"Guy stuff." John said not wanting her to know they were talking about her and Teyla.

"Women." Nalani said to Teyla

"How do you know it was about women?" John asked curiously

"Because whenever women ask men what they are talking about and they say something like Guy stuff' it normally always means they were talking about women." Nalani said as her eyes went to Ronon's mouth. She suddenly thought about what it would be like to kiss him. As she thought about that she took a drink of her drink and choked on it.

"Are you okay?" Teyla asked concernedly

"Yeah just went down the wrong." Nalani said as she felt her cheeks grow a little warm.

The rest of the meal was pleasant conversation with Ronon's eyes appreciating Nalani every now and then. He had to admit she was a very attractive woman and he would eventually share the same bed as she did. That was one thing he was sure of. He just needed to get closer to her. The game of seduction was a very fun one, but only if  
the outcome was just as fun.

"So, are you really ready for this mission?" John asked as he broke through Ronon's thoughts. John wanted to make sure that Nalani was a hundred percent ready for facing a wraith. It was bad enough that Col. Marshall Sumner died nearly four years ago, but to have his daughter here and under his care brought back all that guilt.

"I think I am, but Teyla could tell you better." she said as she felt a shiver go up her spine. She knew Ronon was undressing her with his eyes. It was exciting. He wanted her that much she was sure of, but would it be worth the complications? They did work together and for a while would be living together.

"I think she is more than ready." Ronon stated _She's ready for a lot more than this mission'_ he thought to his self as he caught the look she had in her eyes.

"Ronon's right she is ready for this." Teyla agreed.

"Good." John said noticing that Ronon hadn't taken his eyes from Nalani's face.

"You know it's a shame that we're not allowed to spar together anymore." Nalani said to Ronon as her eyes met his once more.

"He's just looking out for you." Ronon said testing her reaction" I can be a little rough."

"Maybe I wouldn't want it any other way." Nalani teased him. _I'm playing with fire, but I don't think I care.' _She thought to herself as she gave Ronon a sexy smile.

"Don't worry kiddies I'll let you two play together soon." John said. Even an idiot could feel the heat right now.

Teyla just watched the interaction. _Ronon had set his sights a little too high this time._' she thought as she then looked at Nalani' _Maybe he didn't.' _she countered her self. She liked Nalani and knew that she had gone through a lot.

"Perhaps the two of them would be good against each other." Teyla suggested to John.

"After this mission we'll see about letting the kids play together again." John said as he smiled at Teyla.


	3. Chpt 3

_**Disclaimer: I own nothing and no one in SGA**_

**Chapter Three**

"People keep your eyes open." John said as they walked through a well traveled path that lead into a deep forest.

Teyla was behind him with Rodney behind her. Nahani was behind Rodney putting Ronon in the back.

John concern was for those that did not have a weapon to be protected. They were for now.

Nalani felt Ronon's hand accidentally' brush her ass every now and then. She just shook her head and keep on walking. She heard a strange noise above her head and look up to see what it was. It looked like fighter planes, but they weren't. They were different.

"What the hell are those?" Nalani asked as everyone stopped dead still.

"Wraith darts." Ronon said bitterly

"From the sound they are many." Teyla said as she listened carefully

"Maybe me and Nalani should take cover." Rodney suggested not ready to be captured by the wraith so soon after nearly getting eaten by them.

"I'm not running from them." Nalani said fiercely. She wanted to fight them to let them know who she was just before she killed them all.

Just as the words left her mouth four wraith dropped down in front of them.

"Everyone take cover!" John said

Teyla's back was to Rodney's as Nalani's was to Ronon. John was covering Teyla when out of the corner of his eye he saw Nalani stab a wraith that reached out to touch her face.

Shots were fired from everyone who had a weapon. Rodney somehow was shoved into Nahani and together they fell into some bushes. Nalani struggled to get back to her feet without putting Rodney in harms way.

"Are you okay?" she asked him.

"Nalani get down!" Ronon yelled to her as a wraith was about to shoot her, but before it could she snatched up a gun off the ground and shot it.

She left Rodney in the bushes as she fought at Ronon's side their backs were pressed against each other and she could feel every muscle in his upper body tense. One by one the wraith went down as they made their way back toward the gate. Rodney managed to open the gate and he went through. Next was Teyla then John knowing that Ronon would protect Nalani followed.

"Go on I to you covered." Ronon said to her, but she kept fighting." Go now before both of us end up dead!"

"I'm not leaving you here to fight them alone!" she shouted to him

He made a feral growl and at the moment he moved to drag her through the gate she was shot. She went down as he instantly picked her up.

"I'm okay." she said painfully

"I know." Ronon said as they went through the gate together.

"I need a medical team down here now!" John shouted as he went to Nalani's side.

"What happened?" Elizabeth asked concerned as she made her way toward them.

"Wraith were all over the place." John said as the medical team came to get Nalani

"I'm really okay it's just a little graze." she said pissed that she was shot by a wraith of all creatures.

"We'll let Dr. Beckett be the judge of that." John said as he went with them to the infirmary

Ronon was about to follow them when he got lost in memories of his past. Seeing Nalani get shot reminded him of how Melena died. He couldn't lose someone else like he did her. The only difference between the two was that he wasn't in love with Nalani. Lust was not the same. Nor was Nalani dead.

"Ronon." Teyla called to him as she saw the brief flash of pain in his features. He remembered something from his past that troubled him.

"I'm coming." he said as he walked over to her and they went to find out how Nalani was.

"She's okay it nothing that a band-aid and some ointment didn't take care of." Dr. Beckett said to them as they walked in the infirmary." She's upset that she was shot by the wraith."

"I know how she feels." Ronon said as he went over to her bedside.

"Tell me I at least killed one of them sons of a bitches." she said to Ronon

"You killed more than one." he confirmed.

"Good." she said as she looked at him" what?"

"Nothing I'm just glad you're not hurt worse." he said covering for what he was really thinking.

"We all are." John said.

Nalani gave them both a cautious look before she stood up.

"Take care of yourself lass." Dr. Beckett said

"She will." Ronon and John said at the same time

Nalani just rolled her eyes at them and walked out. She needed to get some steam out of her system. She went to the sparring room and changed as she did a few stretches to warm up.


	4. Chpt 4

_**Disclaimer: I own nothing or no one in SGA**_

**Chapter Four**

Nalani was in her quarters taking care of her throbbing shoulder. Dr. Beckett gave her a long lecture after he saw her coming back from the sparring room shortly after being shot. He gave her an ice pack and ordered her to rest. He told her if she didn't he'd talk to Col. Sheppard and Ronon about getting her some guards for the next couple of days. So, here she sat on her bed listen to sounds of the water outside. She thought about what happened on her first mission. She was reckless that much she would agreed to. She almost got herself and Ronon killed. Just seeing the wraith for the first time all she could think about was avenging her father. He wouldn't have been happy with how she handled her self. She was waiting for Col. Sheppard to give her the lecture and tell her she couldn't go any other missions until she could better control her self. He never came it had been almost a week. Maybe he was just waiting for the right time. Se didn't know. Her doors swished opened as she sat up she saw Ronon standing in her door way. He filled her doorway perfectly. The look in his eyes told her this wasn't a social visit. She gave him a sexy smile as she laid back down.

"If you had waited about thirty more minutes you would've caught me wet and naked in the shower." she teased trying to lighten the mood he seemed to be in. She deserved it, but wasn't ready for it.

"If I had wanted you naked you would be." he said as he came in and pulled up a chair." We need to talk about what happened."

"I thought maybe we could have some hot fun sex first before the talk." she didn't know why she was in this teasing sexual mood all of a sudden.

"Don't tempt me." he said knowing that she only wanted to distract him from talking about what happened.

"But it's so much fun." she said as she tossed the melted pack of ice to the ground and sat up giving him her best come hither look.

"You almost got me killed." he stated his voice remaining calm. He knew she wasn't being serious so, he just got straight to the point." In the process you almost got yourself killed."

"Yeah about that." she started feeling bad for getting him caught in the middle of her personal fight with the demons that haunted her every night.

"I know better than anyone what it's like to lose everything." He started, but she interrupted him

"You don't understand what it was like for me to see them alive." she laid back down fighting tears that burned the back of her eyes.

"I am probably the only person that does really understand." he said as he moved to sit on the edge of her bed." You're not the only person who's lost someone they care for to the wraith."

"I never said I was." she said as she sat up and met his eyes. There was a lot of pain in those gorgeous depths.

"I lost my entire planet. I watched the woman I loved die right in front of me. I have nothing left to go back to." he confessed to her." They placed a device inside of me that they could track every move I made. People died because of me. I lost seven years of my life that I can never get back."

"I am truly sorry that I almost got you killed." she realized she wasn't the only one suffering." I lost my father to the wraith." She looked down at her hands" The day I found out I had just caught the man I was about to marry in bed with another woman and I had just lost a baby I didn't even know I was carrying. I felt like I had lost everything." She took a deep breath" When I was shooting those creatures and they were dying it was the first time in over a year that I really felt alive." a tear fell down her cheek onto the top of her hand." I never meant to get anyone else hurt."

"I know you didn't." he said in a understanding voice. Now that he knew how bad she really had it he understood a little more.

"How can you be so understanding?" she questioned as her eyes met his searching for something she didn't even know what it was." After everything you've been through and I almost cost you your life. Yet here you are sharing your pain with me." she was seeing him in this whole knew light.

"I still have the urge to risk my life if it means that a wraith would die, but I'm learning there are more important things in life." he told her softly

She didn't know what else she could say and so she remained silent. She got up to walk over to her desk for what she didn't know, but the sudden urge to lean on Ronon's shoulder and cry made her want to get away from him. She was not a weak woman that needed a man to comfort her. She was strong enough to hold her own. As she walked in front of Ronon she felt his hand come out to grab her wrist. She turned to face him.

"I don't have anything that's worth fighting for anymore." she told him as another tear fell down her cheek this time it landed on Ronon's hand. "If I did then maybe facing the wraith would be easier." her heart was telling Ronon to just let go of her arm, but her body was reacting to his touch in a way she never felt it react to any man's touch.

"You just got to find yourself again." he said as gently rubbed circles on her wrist. He didn't want to brake this moment they had right now, but he also didn't want her to do something to cover up her pain. He couldn't resist the urge to pull her near and kiss her.

"Ronon." she whispered as he pulled her unresisting body against his as his mouth met hers.

It was just meant to comfort her and let her know that there was something worth fighting for and it was life. The moment his lips met hers a fire was ignited inside of her. She wanted to feel so much more so she leaned into him. His arms wrapped around her waist and pulled her back on top of him as he laid back on the bed. Her  
weight on top of him was like heaven. The feel of her skin as his hand found their way up inside her shirt was soft like silk.. Her hands found their own way inside his shirt to feel his skin.

"Wait." he said as he rolled her over onto her back" I can't let you do this."

"You're not I want to." she said her body filling up with a burning need to have him

"I know you do, but you don't want to like this." he said as he disentangled his self from her reluctantly" When this happens between us it will be because you came to me of your own free will not because you're upset."

She sat up and looked at him as it hit her what he was meaning. He wanted her, but not like this and if she were honest she wanted him too just not because she was upset.

"You're right I just wanted to feel something other than this pain and emptiness. You made me feel something other than those things for a while." she confessed softly as she looked down at her hands.

"You made me feel something too." he told her as he sat back down on the bed with her.

"I'm not a weak person." she said as her eyes met his and held them a fierce determination was in her depths.

"I know you're not believe me I've seen you fight." he said as he saw her smile

"Well, then you're about to see me a vulnerable female." she said" If you don't mind would you like to stay here until I fall asleep?"

"Did you think I was leaving." he said to her" I was planning on staying anyway."

"And what if I had decided I didn't want you to stay?" she questioned as she still smiled. Ronon had this way of making her feel like things would be okay even if they didn't seem like they were at the moment.

"It wasn't a choice." he said.

She laughed as he helped her crawl into bed and laid next to her. He wrapped his arms around her as she snuggled into his body.

"Just don't take advantage of me while I'm asleep." she teased as she snuggled into his body. It was nice and warm. She felt safe like nothing could hurt her.

"Just don't wiggle around to much." he said close to her ear. It would take all his strength not to touch those places he wanted to touch, but he wanted to gain her trust and respect. She needed to know there was more to life than fighting and running. It's funny that he thought of that when that's all he had been for the last eight years. He felt her snuggle close into his body he was feeling something more than lust this much he understood. He just didn't want to acknowledge it just yet. It was too soon for that.


	5. Chpt 5

**A/N: **_I know this chapter's a little short, but it's mostly just a filler chapter._

_**Disclaimer: I own nothing or no in SGA**_

**Chapter Five**

"Hey Dr. Sumner can I talk to you a second?" Laura asked as the two passed by each other in the hall leading toward the lab. Nalani paused at the sound of her last name as a sad smile came across her lips.

"Only if you call me Nalani." She told her with a soft smile.

"Okay, Nalani." She said as she returned her smile" I was looking for you so I went to the lab, but Rodney said you were late as usual then he muttered something about you not paying him no mind or something." she paused" Anyhow I wanted to invite you to our Nightly Girl's Night in' It's at my quarters around nine." She waited for Nalani's answer.

"Yeah Rodney's not happy with me, but he doesn't ever voice his concerns." she said wondering if it had something to do with the fact that Ronon has been in her bed every night for the past week. They never did anything except sleep. It was really becoming hard for her to just sleep in the same bed as him and not fully be with him. This girl's night would be a great excuse as to why he couldn't stay tonight.

"He has this thing with not being able to talk to women." Laura said as they two shared a soft laugh.

"Yeah we all know that." she said" I'll be there as soon as I get done with my lab work tonight."

"Great I'll see you then." she said as she smiled brightly and walked away.

This was the perfect way to get Ronon off her mind and out of her bed at least for tonight. She thought as she walked into the lab. Rodney looked up at her and then glanced at the clock above her head, but said nothing. She rolled her eyes as she walked over by Zalenka.

"You know it's okay to say something about me being late." Nalani said to Rodney.

"I'm use to it by now." he said in a sarcastic tone as he went out of the lab.

"He's just in this mood." Zalenka said to her as he gave her a friendly smile

"Yeah I noticed. Maybe he just needs to get laid." she said as they both laughed

"But by who?" Zalenka questioned as Nalani busted out laughing." Oh, that wasn't suppose to be funny I was seriously asking who would want to have sex with him?" Nalani couldn't help, but keep laughing as Zalenka just shook his head.

"You know I wonder if he would shut up long enough to do anything with a woman?" Nalani feeling in a good mood kept teasing.

"I couldn't see it happening the poor girl would probably be off doing herself." Zalenka laughed this time

"Oh wow we've been working way to hard to be laughing about Rodney's sex life or lack of." she said still laughing

"Yes, we have, but what else would we do, but laugh it since it does not exist?" Zalenka threw at her as Rodney came up back into the lab

"What seems to be so funny over here?" Rodney questioned as he looked fro one to the other

"You wouldn't get the joke." Zalenka stated as Nalani laughed.

"Of course I would come on try me." Rodney really curious as to what was so funny pressed on

"Remember you told me to get some test returned to you ASAP and if you stay here pestering me about something that wasn't that funny to begin with I'll never get it done." Nalani covered as she turned her back to Rodney.

"You never listen to me anyway." Rodney said as he noticed neither one was telling him anything" Fine I don't want to know anyway." he turned to complete his task as Nalani and Zalenka shared a silent smile with amusement.


	6. Chpt 6

**A/N: **_Another short chapter, but like with the other one it's just a filler leading up to the good one._

_**Disclaimer: I own no one or nothing in SGA**_

**Chapter Six**

When Nalani got through with her things in the lab she went back to her room to shower and change into something better for going over to Laura's. As she got out of the shower she realized there was someone else in her room. She wrapped the towel around her as she cautiously stepped out of the bathroom. There sat Ronon on her bed with his head in his hands rubbing his temples. He looked like he had a bad day. She could see the tension in his muscles. Out of sheer instinct she placed her hand gently on his shoulder. He placed his hand over hers as he looked up into her eyes. For the first time in a long time she was able to see to the depths of his soul almost. So much pain. So much anger. Most of all there was loneliness hidden there deep within the walls he put up.

"I'm not staying the night." he stated as his eyes fell from hers. His voice sounded like his was giving something up. It hurt his ears to hear it. He couldn't do this to his self anymore. He wanted her too much to just lay in the same bed with her and not touch her or kiss her. This was the only way.

"Good because I'm going to Laura's room for a girl's night in." Something was different in Ronon she could tell, but what was it? She wanted to wipe away all the lines she saw now from stress and worry.

"That's good we could all use a brake." he said meaning more toward the two of them from each other than anything.

"Did something happen on you guys mission to put you in this mood?" she asked both curious and concerned.

" No the mission was fine." he told her as his eyes met hers once more" I just can't sleep in the same bed with you anymore and not have sex with you."

"It was your choice to stay." she reminded him relived that he was feeling the same way as she was. Frustrated.

"The next time we are in bed we'll be naked it's the only way." He said as he pulled her down to him and kissed her roughly" Enjoy your girl's night." he carefully got up and left her kneeling on the floor at the edge of her bed. She was shocked and surprised, but most of all she was relived that Ronon wanted her the same way she did him. She smiled softly to herself as she got dressed and headed to Laura's.

When she got there the party was pretty much already started, but she just joined right in. Tequila shots and fruity drinks. It was well after three in the morning when the party started to wind down.

"We should do this again." Kate said as she walked out.

"Oh of course we are." Nalani said as she downed another shot.

"I'm glad you came." Laura said as they walked over to the door

"So am I." Nalani said

"Maybe I should walk you back to your room." Laura suggested as Nahani fell on her butt.

"No, that's okay." she said as she got up

"You're going to be sore in the morning." Laura said as she laughed.

Nalani fumbled and stumbled down the hall going toward her room, but stopped at Ronon's door. She didn't know what came over other than way to much to drink she opened the door prepared to step in, but instead a soft touch on her shoulder caused her to turn around she looked right into Ronon's eyes.

"What are you doing here?" he asked as he sensed her intoxication.

He was also curious as to why she was here so late. He didn't know if he could tell her to leave even if it was the right thing to do.


	7. Chpt 7

_**Disclaimer: I own nothing and no one in SGA**_

**Chapter Seven**

Nalani was stunned by his sudden appearance and finding her words were hard at this moment. She just starred into his eyes.

"You should get back to your room." he said knowing she was drunk.

"Why are you up so late?" she asked dismissing his remark about her going back to her room. That was the last thing she wanted to do.

"I was sparring. You had fun at your girls night." he said as he walked into his room followed by her.

"Too much fun I think." she laughed a little as the door shut behind her.

"Why are you here?" he repeated his earlier question as he sat down on his bed.

"I was thinking about what you said in my room." she started praying the tequila would give her the courage she so needed right now.

Ronon just looked at her waiting for her to finish.

"I wanted to tell you that I feel the same way." she said as he raised a brow at her statement.

"You do?" he questioned wanting to be sure her heard her right.

"Yes." she said" It's so hard to just sleep in the same bed as you and not truly have you." before she could say anything else Ronon had closed the distance between them

"You're telling me that you want me like I want you?" he searched her eyes for answer beyond alcohol.

"I want you so bad that it invades my dreams." She looked him right in his eyes." Every touch. Every look. It drives me crazy to be so close to you and yet so far away from what I want. What I need." She let out a breath feeling little light headed as the room spun a little" You are what I want. What I need.

"What do you want and need?" Ronon asked as he searched her eyes.

"You." she said softly

"Me what?" He pressed wanting to hear her say what she was asking for." To hold you? To sleep next to you?"

"And more." she said feeling a nervous tingle go up her spine.

"What would the more be?" he questioned

"I want to feel your body not just holding me while I sleep I want to be in a place that only you could bring me. I want to have sex with you right here and now." there it was out she had finally spoken what she wanted out loud.

Ronon didn't say anything more he just pulled her to him and crushed her lips to his. Close began to hit the floor carelessly as he pulled her with him toward his bed. The bed hit the backs of her knees and she fell on it pulling him with her. His hands skimmed over her body creating wonderful sensations to go through her body.

Goose bumps were left as his hands touched her soft skin. This wasn't the traditional soft and sweetness it was pure passion filled satisfaction. It was what they wanted. What they needed. Nothing else matter. Not the war that raged beyond Atlantis nor the people within the walls. All that matter was this moment. Everything else would take care of it self with time.


	8. Chpt 8

_**Disclaimer: I own nothing no no one from SGA**_

**Chapter Eight**

Bright light shined on the lids of Nalani's eyes as she slowly began to wake up. Her eyes refused to opened as if they were glued shut or something. Her head felt like it weighted a tone and it hurt badly. She stretched out her legs and jerked one back as it connected with another leg. A hairy toned man leg. She jumped into a sitting position and looked at the guy laying next to her. It was Ronon. Her head hurt worse now that she jumped up so fast. She laid  
back down and held her head trying to remember every detail of what the night before, but nothing came to mind.

"Damn Laura and her girl's night with Tequila." she muttered quietly as she tried to move her legs off the bed, but realized she had no clothes on." Ronon Dex what the hell happened?" she smacked him on his arm bringing him out of his peaceful sleep.

"Why are you hitting me so early in the morning?" he questioned still half a sleep.

"You took advantage of me last night didn't you?" she accused him as she held her head that was still throbbing.

"Is that what you think I did." he said as he came to a full awake state and sat up to look at her.

She saw the hurt in his eyes, but if they didn't have sex then why was she naked and him... in shorts and a white tank top.

"How did... I... " she didn't know what to say everything was all fuzzy to her." Did we..." she looked over at him and for a second their eyes met.

"Did we what?" he asked as he pushed a piece of hair out of her face. He was enjoying this moment. Her face was a shade of pink and yet he still saw the desire in her eyes.

"Ronon you know what I'm asking." she said frustrated at how calm he was being. As much as she worried that something happened last night that she couldn't remember she felt her body respond to his warmth.

"If you're asking if we had sex then you really don't know me as well as I thought you did." he said to her in a serious tone as he looked deep into her eyes.

She was so confused and her head still hurt. She didn't believe that Ronon would have sex with as intoxicated as she was, but then again he was only a man. She was way passed being drunk and if she came on to him she couldn't blame him for taking what was right in front of him. She let out a soft breath and closed her eyes.

"Ronon I trust you above everyone else here, but I can't remember anything from last night after I left Laura's and I tend to be a little flirtatious when I'm that drunk. I just want to make sure I didn't go too far with you since I don't r_emembe_r it." she said emphasizing the word remember'.

"It got a little out of hand when you showed up here, but I stopped it." he said truthfully as he got a flash of her naked body beneath his. He could have taken what she so boldly offered him last night, but he didn't want to take advantage of her. When they made love she would be completely sober and aware of everything he was doing to  
her.

"Thank you for looking out for me in my state of mind last night." she said grateful that at least one of them was thinking clearly last night. She also regretted that they didn't sleep together." When I woke up next to you without my clothes on and after you said you could no longer just sleep in the same bed as me... I just  
assumed that in my drunken state I did what I've been wanting to do from the first time I saw you." her eyes now met his and she saw the darkening of his eyes at her confession.

"I didn't want to take advantage of you." he told her as he caressed her face gently." Don't get me wrong I want you and will have you, but not while you're drunk." he leaned over and kissed her deeply

"You are so full of yourself." she told him once he lifted his head.

Truth be told she wanted him now.

"No, I just know when a woman wants me and you do." he told her as she laughed.

"Stop Ronon while you're ahead." she said as she playfully smacked his arm.

"Get dressed and we'll go spar." he said as he got out of bed and headed to the shower.

"I need lots of aspirin before I move out of this bed." she said to him, but he had the shower on and didn't hear her.

Good thing was nothing happened last night. Bad thing was nothing happened last night. She had this feeling that her and Ronon's relationship had just taken a different turn. They went from comforting friends to something more. She liked this. It was exciting and fresh. Something that she wanted to melt in her memory to erase all the pain from her past. She finally had something worth fighting for. It stunned her at how this was becoming the best trip she ever took. With the exception of that one trip to Vegas in college with a bunch of friends for a wild night of fun. Boy was it fun. She smiled at the memory. Life was definitely looking better for her


	9. Chpt 9

_**Disclaimer: I own nothing nor no one in SGA**_

**Chapter Nine**

It had been nearly a months since Nalani had gotten beyond drunk and nearly ended up sleeping with Ronon. She was thankful that he was a decent guy, but at the same time it frustrated the hell out of her. What was wrong with her that made him think he needed to be such a decent guy? She wanted the Ronon Dex she had heard stories about on the way to Atlantis. The Ronon Dex that made her body tingle in every place seen and unseen. That was who she wanted. Who she needed. She had made her mind up after thinking about this for a while that she was not going to depend so much on him like she had been.

She was going to stand on her own two feet no matter how hard it was and whatever impulses she felt toward him she would act on them besides waiting for him to make the first move. Maybe all he needed was for to shove him into bed. She smiled as she thought about this. She was sitting in the puddle jumper with John and Rodney waiting for Ronon as well as Teyla to return from their search for help. Once they came through the gate the jumper had trouble and here they sat. John thought it would be better if Ronon and Teyla went in search of help while he stayed back to protect Rodney and Nalani. Nalani knew he still didn't trust her to use her better judgment. He was still cautious of her thinking when it came to the wraith which she completely understood.

She scared herself that day and since then she had been working on her self control. She moved from the back where she was content to stay to where Teyla normally sat so she could talk to John one on one. She didn't know him very well, but she knew him to be a really compassionate guy with the people around him. He didn't really share his feelings, but his actions spoke louder than his words ever could. She sighed as she sat next to him. He looked over at her and gave her this boyish smile then he looked out in front of him. She tried to hide her little smile as she did the same. Finally after about a minute he turned back to her curious as to why she wanted to sit next to him. He also wanted to make sure that it wasn't a promblem he needed to avoid.

"What's on your mind?" he asked as she turned to look at him. He was struck by how beautiful her eyes really were even though he wasn't into her because his heart was getting more involved with Teyla ever day. It was no wonder why Ronon spent so many nights with her. Then it hit him why she would need to talk to him, but not know what to say." You're not..." he didn't even know how to ask her

"I'm not what?" she asked confused for a second then she caught his look and realized what he wanted to ask. She was going to drag this out because he was so cute right now and it was amusing.

"Um, well, you and Ronon have been spending a lot of time together." he started trying to figure out how to ask her what he wanted and needed to know.

"So, do you and Telya. As a matter of fact I spend a lot of time with Rodney to so, what could you possibly be thinking?" she raised a brow at him trying to control the urge to grin.

"Hell, I'm just going to ask are you pregnant?" there he asked it and now he would deal with the outcome. He just hoped he could.

"Why Lt. Col. John Sheppard are you trying to say I'm putting on weight?" she asked with fake offensiveness. This was really not what she was expecting. She thought maybe he'd ask if she was sleeping with Ronon not if she was pregnant.

"No, not at all. It's just that you have never came to talk to me about anything and now all of a sudden here you are." he said as he looked out in front of him.

"Well, since you asked so nicely" she started as she looked at his profile and smiled" No, I'm not pregnant. Infact I'm not a medical doctor, but I'm pretty sure you have to a man to get pregnant and well I haven't had sex in so long I doubt I even remember how to do it." she knew he was uncomfortable, but he deserved it after asking  
her if she was pregnant.

"Well, I'm sure you still know how." he said relieved that she wasn't pregnant and nothing was going on with her and Ronon. At the same time he was worried that maybe Ronon hadn't been with Nalani because he was interested in someone else. A gorgeous anthosian woman to be exact. "I'm also glad that you're not pregnant because  
you'd have to be put on restriction until after the baby was born besides it would be hard to explain to the people back home. So, what did you want to talk about?" he turned to look at her now and saw a sad look cross her features.

"I wanted to talk to you about my dad. No one has really told me about how he died other than the wraith killed him unless you ask Col. Caldwell who says you were the one that killed him. I know it's hard for you, but I need to know so that I can have some type of closure. " she looked deep into his eyes and saw the sorrow in his depths. He blamed his self for her father's death. She wanted to take him in her arms and tell him it wasn't his fault that the  
wraith had killed her father, but she also needed to hear it from him.

"Okay when we first came here we went off world and the planet we went to was Teyla's. We were captured by the wraith. We didn't know it at the time, but our being here awakened the wraith. Before I could get to Col. Sumner a wraith had drained so much of his life that there was no saving him." he paused as he looked back out in front of him" I had to finish it for him. I know I would've wanted him to do the same for me." he waited for her to accuse him of murdering her father, but she didn't. Instead she reached out and touched his hand.

"He would've. It's not your fault that he's dead. " she reassured him softly as he turned to look in her eyes.

He was about to say something anything, but he didn't have time to because Rodney who had been surprisingly quite up until now spoke up.

"Ronon and Teyla are coming back." he said as he looked at them both.

"They have help." John said softly as he looked over at Nalani who had gotten up and returned to her seat.

After a while the puddle jumper was fixed and they were on the way back to Atlantis. Nalani's thoughts were on Ronon. Now she had closer with her father's death all she had to do was move forward.


	10. Chpt 10

_**Disclaimer: I own no one or nothing in SGA**_

**Chapter Ten**

Nalani walked into the mess hall looking for Teyla. She needed some good strong female advice. It was after midnight and no one else would be in there so this was a perfect time to discuss what was on her mind. Ronon Dex!

"Hey Teyla are you busy?" she asked as she sat across from her. She hoped talking with Teyla would help ease her mind.

"I was just going to my quarters, but you look like you need to talk." she paused as she searched the other woman's face. _It must be about Ronon.'_ she thought as she brought her eyes to Nalani's eyes." What is troubling you so late?"

"Well, as you might have guessed it's Ronon." Nalani said softly as she looked at her hands.

"I guessed as much." Teyla said as she waited for her to go on.

"I'm having a hard time keeping him and my feelings for him at bay." she confessed softly

Teyla just listened patiently

"We work together and live in the same place so it would not be a good idea to do anything." she said as she looked deep into Teyla's eyes" Then on the other hand I'm not sure I want to anymore." She paused as Teyla just waited calmly for her to go on" He's cocky andsure of his self, but I've seen the warm, compassionate side of him that he rarely lets anyone see. In the few months I've known he's got under my skin and into my dreams. I miss his warm body next to mine. I miss waking up to him in the morning and going to sleep wrapped in his arms at night. What do you think I should do?"

"I think you should follow your heart it will never lead you wrong." Teyla said softly as she thought back to her feelings for John. _ I should take my own advice'_ she thought She remember John telling her that Ronon had went to him about his feelings for Nalani. It was amazing at how they both felt the same way about each other and neither one knew." Ronon really is a wonderful guy, but he is also guarded inside because he trusts no one."

"I know I've seen that side of him too." Nalani said softly as she looked back down at her hands." You're right I need to follow my heart." she got up to leave then looked back at Teyla" Thank you. Oh by the way you need to follow your heart too Teyla. John's a great guy and he's been through a lot too." she walked out leaving Teyla shocked sitting at the table.

Nalani was half way up the stairs leading to the corridor that lead to her room. She felt more than heard him as she stopped and turned around. He looked tired. She could still smell his soap from his shower.

"Hey." Ronon said as his eyes met hers. He had a hard training session tonight and all he wanted was to see her. To touch her body. To kiss her lips. He needed her tonight and he would have her.

"I was going to go by your room." she said as she felt tingles going through her body and he hadn't even touched her yet.

"What for?" he asked as he searched her face

"I wanted to stay the night with you." she said as she swallowed

He just raised an eye brow at her.

"I'm tired of denying myself and you. I want you with every fiber of my being." she started, but he cut her off by kissing her.

"Tonight things change for both of us." he said as he swept her up in his arms." I can't just lay in the same bed with you tonight nor will I." he said making his intentions clear to her.

"I don't want you to." she said as she smiled at him" I want you to make love to me tonight."

Tonight both their lives would change for better or for the worst it would be up to their choices in the morning. For now nothing else matter.


	11. Chpt11

_**Disclaimer: I own nothing or no one in/on SGA**_

**Chapter Eleven**

Once inside Ronon's room he let her body slowly slide down his until her feet hit the ground. He made sure her soft body felt every inch of his hard body. There was no doubt in her head that he wanted her she could feel it even through the clothes they wore. The moment her feet hit the ground Ronon stepped back to where not one part of him was touching her except his eyes. She blushed under the scrutiny of his eyes it was like he could see her naked. He probably could. Her eyes met his and she saw the desire clear in the depths of his eyes. He almost made her take a step back, but instead she held her ground. She saw something else in his eyes, but couldn't name what it was for it was only there for a brief second then it was gone. She swallowed hard as she smiled at him and leaned into him to plant a passion filled kissed on his waiting lips. It didn't take him long to take full control of the situation as he deepened her kiss. He forced her backwards toward the bed, but she stumbled and fell with him landing hard on top of her.

"Och." she said as his weight landed on her and his head hit hers. _Oh that's just great I'm gonna kill the man before I have sex with him.' _she thought as she saw the look of concern in his eyes.

"Are you okay?" he asked searching her face.

"If you stop I want be." she replied as she pulled his face down to hers and kissed him.

"I just wanted to make sure." he said against her lips as his kissed her back.

Their tongues met in an age old dance of passion as he touched her body through her clothes. He wanted their first time together to last so he forced his self to go slow. Her kisses grew frantic and she pulled at his clothes. He slowly sat up and pulled her with him. He looked into her eyes searching for answer to his unasked questions. She smiled at him silently answering each one with answers she didn't even know she gave. It had been so long since he had allowed anyone to get this close to him.

"Ronon, I want you inside of me now." she muttered as she kissed his neck.

"In time I will be so far inside of you, you'd swear we were one person." he vowed as he kissed her neck and slowly started removing her clothes.

Once she was completely naked she returned the favor by removing his clothes. She allowed her finger tips to gently brush across his skin and felt him suck in a sharp breath. She saw the scares that marred his smooth skin from his year as a warrior and the wraith. He had been through so much and now here he was allowing her this close to him without keeping anything from her. She leaned over and kissed one scare that was across the upper left side of his chest. His skin felt hot beneath her lips as she kissed her way to his lips. He leaned forward using his weight to push her back onto the floor. He thought about moving to the bed, but this was just as good.

He brought his lips to her breast and kissed them until they begged for more. Her moans of pleasure and anticipation egged him on to what they both wanted. He touched her soft skin allowing his hands to memorize every inch of her body. By the time he entered her she was so ready he thought he had died from all the pleasure he felt. Her warmth was like coming home for him. She filled a place in his heart that he thought would never be filled. She kept him from going off into his self. Her legs wrapped around his waist as she pulled him deeper into her body.

Her nails scrapped across his back. He drove on until she screamed out in pleasure. His release came shortly after hers. He picked her up and brought her to the bed where he started up her fires again. Afterwards they lay wrapped in twisted sheets and each others arms. Ronon stroked her hair as she lay next to him. Nalani couldn't find words to express how she felt right at this moment, but she knew Ronon had got into her hear in a way no one else could. Neither one wanted this moment to end.

Reality brought the wraith, blood shed, and death for them. As long as they could stay in this room for a while they could ignore all that. Nothing else matter in this room only them and the moment they had now. Reality would come soon enough. Nalani just wished she could bottle this up so she could always have this beautiful moment they shared now. Ronon on the other hand already had plans for more of these moments.


	12. Chpt 12

_**Disclaimer: I own nothing/ no one in/on SGA**_

**Chapter Twelve**

Rodney walked into the lab expecting to only see a few others from the night shift, but he knew he wouldn't be seeing Nahani until three hours after she was supposed to be here. At least That's what he thought until he walked in and saw her hard at work at her desk. She looked like she had been there for hours. He gave her a quizzical look as he approached her desk. She looked up at him and smiled brightly.

"Good morning Rodney you're late." she teased as she looked back at her computer screen.

"Yes, well, it's seems like someone got themselves an alarm clock." he said not knowing how to react to her being early and not late like she always was.

"You could say that." she thought back to how Ronon woke her up this morning. Her body still tingled from his touch." It's quite an amazing alarm clock." she smiled as she continued working

"I'm sure it is you should keep it around so you're here early more often." he said not knowing what she actually meant, but not wanting to get into a discussion with her right now." We have a lot of work to finish up on and I'm going to need you to come with us off world so you can learn to handle yourself better." he sat down across from her as he sipped his coffee.

Nalani knew Rodney was not comfortable with her going off world since she reacted the way she did to seeing the wraith. She didn't blame him she wouldn't trust her either, but then she didn't have nothing to fight for except her resentment now she felt like she had something worth fighting for. After a while Col. Sheppard came into the lab with someone knew. Nalani's eyes met the new persons eyes with a hated glare. She nearly toppled over her chair as she stood up.

"What in the hell are you doing here?" she snapped causing John, Rodney, and few others to look at her shocked.

"Nalani are you feeling okay?" John asked as he felt the tension rise and then he looked at the man that stood beside him. He was a little taller than him with dirty blond hair and blue eyes not bad looking at all, but something told John that this guy had hurt Nalani which now brought on her anger toward him.

"I'm sorry Col. Sheppard, but this...I'm not even sure I want to call him a man because no man in his right mind..." she stopped her self not wanting to air her past out in front of people." I'm going to get some air because suddenly the air was sucked right out of this room." she walked off in a hurry before she said anything else.

"I don't think she likes you very much." Rodney said with a shrug

"Gee what gave you that idea." John said sarcastically

"We have a past and you know how women are when they think they were wronged." Bruce said nonchalantly

"This is Dr. Rodney McKay you'll be working with him for the time being and you already know Dr. Nalani Sumner I'm advising you to stay out of her way I don't want any problems while you're here." John informed him

"I'll be sure to do that sir." Bruce said as he watched him walk out of the lab.

" So, what was your name I didn't get it." Rodney said

"It's Dr. Bruce Green I was sent here by orders to help you on some type of power problem." he informed Rodney

"Yes, we drained our ZPM which unless we find anther one this is all the power we have." Rodney said

When John left the lab he went to go find Nalani to make sure she was okay. After everything she had been through since coming here he didn't want to add to her problems by allowing this guy from her past to be here in her face. He finally found her sitting in the gate room staring at the gate. He could tell by the rapid rise and fall of her shoulders that she was still angry. He approached her cautiously and sat next to her not knowing what to say to make her feel better.

"I'm fine now. It's just seeing him now after all this time brought back all the hate I didn't realize I still harbored for him." She said not looking at John." He's my ex fiancee." she took a deep breath as she started to calm down" He cheated on me the day I got your tape about my father and as if that wasn't enough I also lost a baby I didn't even know I was carrying. I found him in bed with his ex girlfriend in our bed of all places. I was in so much pain that when I left my home I ended up at SGC and I don't even remember clearly how I got there without hurting myself or someone else." she now looked at John

"He has orders from the general to come help Rodney fix our power problem so, I need you to put aside your past for the sake of our city." John said as he searched her face.

"I have. I've found something here that's more important than my past with Bruce. So, not for the sake of this city, but for the sake of my new found happiness I'll let go of my past with him once and for all." she told him as she felt this huge weight be lifted from her shoulders.

"So, no killing him then." John asked as they got feet.

"Aw, now you take all the fun out it." she joked as she smiled at him" Thanks." she reached out and hugged him.

John awkwardly returned the hug. He really liked her. She had grown to prove her self to him. She went through losing everything important to her to now be facing the very beings that took it all and the man that broke her heart. Yet she still had her strength and independence.

"Now that you're all better and I feel better about that why don't we go eat." he suggested knowing that Ronon would be eating right about now and he knew that she'd be in a different mood after seeing him.

"Yeah, I am kind of hungry." she said thinking back to how much of an appetite her and Ronon had worked up.

They walked to the mess hall together in silence neither one felt they needed to say anything, but they both knew that they had taken a step toward being more than just coworkers and less than lovers. They had become friends.


	13. Chpt 13

_**Disclaimer: I own no one or nothing in SGA**_

**Chapter Thirteen**

"You really helped me out when you told me to listen to my heart about Ronon." Nalani told Teyla as they followed the men through a thickly forested trail. Bruce had convinced Dr. Weir that a ZPM was on this planet. It seemed like no one had ever been here. It was so lush. So, gorgeous. It was breath taking.

"I am glad that I could help you." Teyla said as she looked over at the other woman and saw a grin spread across her face." Oh you mean you and Ronon have become intimate?"

"Yeah and it was so amazing." she told her "It was like coming home."

"Well, you too have helped me in making a decision about how to express myself to John." she confessed to her

"So, you're going to tell him you love him right?" Nahani exclaimed

"Well, not in those words exactly, but I will let him know he means a lot to me." she said as they heard a loud growl from the bushes.

Ronon who was just a foot ahead of them heard it too. Then he heard Nalani scream. He turned toward the females and saw a huge yellow cat pinning Nalani against a tree. Teyla was shooting at the creature, but it seemed to have no effect on it. In that moment all he saw was Melenia being killed right in front of him. He could not lose another woman he loved. Without a second thought he threw his self in between the creature and the woman he loved. After a brief confrontation the animal left, but not without leaving a deep gash on Ronon's abdominal and one across Nalani's head.

"Are you okay?" Ronon asked ignoring his pain to make sure she was okay. He reached out and touched her face where the blood had dripped down.

"I'm okay." she said just as Ronon collapsed on her knocking her down with him." Ronon? Ronon?" John heard the panic in Nalani's voice and went to her instantly. Teyla was kneeling down beside her and that was when he saw Ronon on the ground.

"This is Sheppard I need medical assistance asap. We have two injured people one of them is very bad." he said over the comlink.

"We can't leave now the ZPM that you need is just up ahead." Bruce said angry that their mission was interrupted

"Let me explain this to you because you're new." Rodney said" When a team member is injured we attend to them first then if we can come back." He went to help John get Ronon up off of Nalani.

"Just because Nalani's new boy toy is hurt does not mean we have to stop we're wasting valuable time." he snapped

"Get through the gate now that is an order." John said as everyone went through the gate.

Once on the other side Elizabeth came up and asked about what had happened. Nalani could hear what everyone was saying, but it sounded so far away. Finally she collapsed onto the ground.

"Nalani." John said as he caught her before she hit the ground. He knew she was in shock by the look on her face, but he didn't know how bad until she collapsed into his arms. He cared her to the infirmary were Dr. Beckett was examining Ronon. John knew this was not good. Two of his people were down.

Bruce on the hand was pissed that his plane was foiled because of Nalani. He vowed to make her pay for this. She was always messing his life up.


	14. Chpt 14

_**Disclaimer: I own no one and nothing in SGA**_

**Chapter Fourteen**

"You should get some rest you look like hell." John said to Nalani as he walked into the recreation room where she sat watching an old tv show he guessed she had taped and brought with her. It had been weeks since their encounter with the crazy cat that almost killed both her and Ronon. He knew she was scared after seeing Ronon fall because he was saving her life. Ronon was released from the infirmary a week ago. She hadn't went to see him once she found out he was going to be okay. Ronon said she was avoiding him for some reason. John knew it was because she was trying to distance herself from him for fear of losing him the way she did her father.

"Gee John you sure know how to build a woman's confidence." She said sarcastically as he sat next to her on the couch.

"I didn't mean it in a bad way." he said as he looked at her profile. She still had a tiny scar on her forehead from the attack, but otherwise there was nothing bad about her look.

"Really and what part of you look like hell' was supposed to lift my confidence?" she smiled at him as she turned to face him.

He had this boyish charm about him. He was shy with his feelings, but his action spoke volumes. No wonder Teyla felt so strongly about him. Hell she even liked him and that said a lot considering there was not a man that she liked aside from Ronon, but he was different. Somewhere between lust and comfort she had fallen in love with him. She didn't realize it until the giant cat almost killed him. He put his life on the line to save hers and as she saw him fall on her she realized she could not ever allow him to do that again. She had his blood on her once she vowed never to see on her again.

He meant to much to her so she pushed him away. She threw herself into her work which surprised Rodney because normally he was the only one working long hours now they worked together. Bruce was still in the city until they got a ZPM. He was pissed that they never went back to the planet to get what could've been a ZPM, but they had found another planet that had a ZPM. It was just covered with wraith.

"I meant you have not been sleeping well I know cause Rodney tells me you've been working longer hours than him." John said as he looked at her features. She looked like she was beaten and defeated. She'd needed a brake he knew that much just by looking at her. He was worried that if she didn't stop and breath she'd do more damage than good to her self.

"I just can't sleep well anymore." she said as she turned her attention back to the tv. She really did not want to talk about her feelings with him right now. She didn't even know what she was feeling her self.

" That's my point." he said not wanting her to shut him out completely, but needing to get his point across." Alright I didn't want to have to do this, but you're giving me no choice." he paused as she turned to look at him" I'm ordering you to go to your quarters and get at least eight hours of rest tonight. Rodney can handle the lab and if you are needed he will let you know." the look on her face told him she wanted to argue, but knew it was useless." Now I can't order you not to shut Ronon out like you are doing, but I can say that you'll feel better if you let him in. He really cares about you and I know you care about him."

"You have no idea what my feelings are toward Ronon so don't even say you do." she snapped as she got up and left the room.

John ran a frustrated hand through his hair. Where was Teyla when he needed her? Then it hit him. In the years that he'd known her he didn't realize how much he had come to depend on her until now. He had feelings for her he just didn't know how to express them. He also was not sure about her feelings for him. He knew she cared about him on some level, but he didn't know if it was the same as he felt about her. Damn women were more complicate than any military mission he'd ever been on.

At them were always basically simple protect yourself and team. Shoot if necessary women on the other hand were difficult to read let alone understand. He shut off the tv and went to go spar at least he understood that.

"Hey John can we talk." Teyla asked as she saw him heading away from the recreation room. If she didn't talk to him now she would never do it.

"Sure, but if it's about Nalani I've already given her orders to rest as far as her and Ronon are concern I can't do nothing about that." he told her as they stepped back into the recreation room.

"It's not about them though I wish there was something I could do to help ease their fears." she said as they sat down on the couch.

"I know how you feel." he said as he fought the urge to touch her face or even her arm just to have that physical contact.

"I wanted to talk to you about..." she was interrupted by the sound of a gun then a loud scream that sounded like Nalani. She wasn't sure who moved first her or John, but both were out in the hall.

"This is Sheppard someone tell me what's going on." he demanded through the comlink.

"Sir it's Dr. Green he's in the gate room with Nalani." A male voice came over the link.

"I'm on my way tell everyone to stand down until I get there." John said as him and Teyla rushed toward the gate room.

"Sir he's activated the gate and is now trying to drag her through it." the man said to him

"Tell them to lower the shields now." He order. The last thing he needed was to have to rescue of his own because of that man. He knew that if Bruce was able to get Nalani through the gate one of them would not come back alive.

"It's locked somehow we can't control it." he told John.

"You're not taking her through that gate." John said to Bruce as he aimed his gun at him

"It's the only way." he said as he attempted to walk backwards with Nalani, but she deliberately tripped them both.

She scrambled to get away from him, but he grabbed her roughly by the arm. She felt pain shoot through her arm as she fought him. Then using something Ronon had taught her during their many sparing lessons she managed to flip him over her should and on to the ground. It hurt her like hell to do it and caused her to fall as well, but at least the gate was shut down now.

"You son of a bitch you could've killed me." she said as she held her arm. He had shot her in the arm as they fought for control over the weapon.

"We've got it now go see Dr. Beckett." John said to her.

"Yeah I'll do that. I want him gone." She demanded as she looked right into John's eyes" I swear if he isn't I'll kill him myself." she then left the room

"She's just bluffing." Bruce said as he looked at John.

"You're leaving tonight and you'll have to explain to the general why you attacked the late Col. Sumner's daughter and nearly killed her. Better yet I'll tell him all about this and he'll decide what to do with you." John said barley able to contain his anger.

"Then I'll tell him about how she's sleeping with an alien." He spat out" Then you'll have to explain how you let that happen when you're the commanding officer here."

"Ronon is more human than you could ever dream of being." Teyla saidto him as she felt like he had physically slapped her by insulting Ronon.

"Alright enough you shut up." John said as he jerked Bruce up to his feet and forced him down the hall.

"I will go see about Nalani." Teyla said as she was grateful for the excuse to leave the sight of Bruce.

She did not care for the man at all. Nalani had informed her about who the man was when he came here she also told Teyla she had not told Ronon for fear of what Ronon would do to him. Teyla respected her wishes, but also knew that Ronon would have wanted to be told about him. Before she went to check on Nalani she went to get Ronon to tell him about what had happened because despite the distance they needed each other now that much she was sure of.


	15. Chpt 15

_**Disclaimer: I own nothing or no one in SGA**_

**Chapter Fifteen**

When Nalani woke up the first person she saw was Ronon. He was sleeping peacefully next to her side. She wanted so much to reach out and touch him, but she didn't. She couldn't let him get closer to her than he already was because should anything happen to him worse than before she'd be lost without. To have him hate her was better than to not have him at all. At least that's what she kept telling herself. He opened his eyes and they met hers. She didn't say anything she just looked into his eyes.

"You're awake?" he said as he straightened up in the chair. She looked beautiful he thought as he looked at her face.

"Yeah I just woke up." she said trying not to feel the glee she felt as his eyes met hers. She missed him so much." What are you doing here?"

"Teyla told me about Bruce." he said softly as he reached out and took her hand in his" Why didn't you tell me?"

"Because I wasn't sure how to." she said as she felt the tears well up in her eyes." Ronon we can't be together anymore." it hurt her to say the words out loud

"Why?" he asked as she drew back her hand.

"Because I can not give you what you really need." she said tried to reason with him as she held back the tears that threatened to fall." I'm not the woman you really need."

"You don't know anything about what I need or the woman I need." He said to her angry that she could just dismiss what they had so easily." I'm not giving up on you."

"Ronon please don't make this any harder than it already is." She said trying to keep her composure.

"I'm not making it easy for you either." he said as he took her hand in his" If you want to give up on us then you'll have a fight. You've put me through too much for me to just let you go because you're afraid of what you're feeling." he looked right into her eyes" I'm afraid to, but I want to know what it is we have because I know I can live without you I just don't want to have to do it." He leaned over and kissed her fully on the lips.

He tasted her tears as they fell down her cheeks. He felt her give into his kiss as she returned it. He felt her arms wind around his neck as she sighed. He deepened the kiss trying to make her feel half of the frustration that he was feeling by not being with her. It was killing him to not touch her or hold her every night, but he gave her space. When he pulled back he saw how flushed her face was. He gently touched her cheeks that were still wet. He couldn't let her go now.

"I think you should go." she whispered softly

"I'll leave for now, but I will come back when you're ready to be released." He leaned over again and kissed her." I meant what I said." he then walked out of her room.

Nalani sat there in her bed and allowed the tears to fall freely. She felt like she could not breath. She knew she was doing the right thing by pushing him away it was for the best. It was to save his life. She didn't realize anyone else was in her room until she looked up and saw John standing there. He casually walked over to her bedside and sat down not saying a word. She knew he wanted to say something, but just didn't know how.

"What's on your mind?" she asked softly as he handed her a tissue.

"I was just thinking that all you had to do was go to your quarters and rest you didn't have to almost get yourself killed." he teased trying to lighten up the mood.

"Yeah well, what can I say I have a flair for the dramatic." She allowed her self to have a small laugh.

"Next time try not to be so dramatic." he said

"I'll try it's going to be hard, but I'll try." she said as she gave him a smile.

"You're really feeling okay?" he questioned seriously

"Physically I'm fine. I got shot, but otherwise I'm okay." she told him honestly

"Good." he said not knowing what else to say to her he stood up" I'm gonna go and let you rest."

"Good night." she said as he left her alone.

She tried to close her eyes to get rest, but thoughts of Ronon kept invading her mind. Even breathing reminding her of him. His scent was everywhere his touch still lingered on her skin. The taste of his kiss was still on her lips. He was going to drive her crazy. She sighed again as she finally fell into a restless sleep.


	16. Chpt 16

_**Disclaimer: I own nothing and no one in SG**_

**Chapter Sixteen**

"Hey how are you feeling?" John asked as he walked into the sparing room and saw Nalani practicing some moves that Teyla had shown her. He was worried since she had only been released about a week ago, but she looked great.

"I'm good. Dr. Beckett says I'll have a tiny scar, but it's not noticeable unless you see me naked." she paused and looked at him he really was an amazing guy, but he was no Ronon.

"Well, I'm sure Ronon would kick my ass if I saw you naked." He teased as he stepped closer to her" But you know if he didn't know I suppose I could take a quick peek."

"Only if you let me take a quick peek at you naked." she loved joking with him it made her feel good to smile and laugh.

"Well, I'm sure it could be arranged some day." he liked her smile it was better than her anger or tears.

"I'll be waiting anticipating the day I get to see you naked preferably all nice and wet.." she said as she walked over to the benches and grabbed some water to drink.

"So, otherwise how are you and Ronon doing these days?" he sat next to her as he shook his head. He knew what she was going to say, but he really wanted to change the subject.

"The same as when I told him we didn't need to see each other anymore." she said softly as her eyes went to the ground. She really cared about Ronon, but she couldn't be what he really needed. She sighed deeply as she drank some more of her water.

"You know Teyla was about to tell me something the day you got shot, but she never finished. Do you know what she was about to tell me?" he questioned wanting to know what Teyla was about to say to him.

"Even if I did I couldn't say anything to you because Teyla and I are friends." she informed him. So, Teyla was going to actually be honest with him it's about time' she thought to herself as she smiled at John.

"Well, you should know that me and Ronon's been talking and if you're planning on going through with this thing of pushing him away you're going to have a fight on your hands." he informed her.

"I know he's told me that much. I can't do this anymore John." She said softly" I'm so tired of fighting and I'm scared to death to let him back in." she closed her eyes.

"I'm in no position to give you advice, but I'll tell you this." He said as her eyes opened and met his" Coming from someone who knows what it feels like to keep your feelings inside talk to him before you make any firm choices." he put his hand on hers.

"You should tell Teyla how you feel about her as well." she told him as she sighed and put her head on his shoulder" She's a great person and you're a great guy. You two would be great together."

"I could say the same about you and Ronon." John said as he put his  
head on hers.

There was nothing Romantic between the two, but if one was watching them from the outside they'd swear there was. Her and John had something that no one else could get in the middle of. They trusted each other and were opened. Now if only they could be that opened with those they loved.


	17. Chpt 17

_**Disclaimer: I own nothing and no one in SGA**_

**Chapter Seven Teen**

Ronon was sitting down to eat when he saw Nalani walk in with John. She was laughing and her smile was so bright it was amazing that she was the same woman he saw just days ago. Her eyes met his for just a moment. He felt like a hot pan had touched him. That's how hot things were between them. Teyla had already been sitting down across from him as John and Nalani walked over to sit down.

Polite conversation was started, but all Ronon was aware of was the woman sitting next to Teyla. She had consumed his thoughts even his dreams. She had consumed him. His once closed heart was now open to all the possibilities that could happen between them and there was no way he was giving up on her. No matter what kind of bull she came up with or how many reason she listed as to why they should not be together.

"So, you look better today." Teyla said to Nalani.

"Yeah, I'm going to have a little scar, but nothing visible." She said as she caught John's grin.

"Yeah she told me the same thing." he said as he picked up a spoonful of food.

"That is good, but scars are okay." Teyla said knowing she had a few both visible and non visible.

"I have a lot of them." Ronon said as his eyes met hers deliberately

"Well, it's all good for fighters to have scars, but I'm not a fighter." she said softly

"That depends on who you're asking." Ronon stated as he shoveled food into his mouth.

"Can we not do this." Nalani said firmly to him as her eyes met his pleadingly

"Why so it's easier for you to not face the truth." he stated calmly

"Guys we're eating here no arguing." John said wanting to save his self from heart burn.

"He's right." Nalani said as she stood up" I really wish you could be more mature about this, but I guess no matter what galaxy you're in it's the same." she spat out at Ronon as she turned taking her food with her and left.

God he could be such an ass! She thought as she dumped her food out and stormed out of the Mess hall.

"You should go apologize." Teyla said as she looked at Ronon

"Why I did nothing, but stat the truth." he said to her

"You pissed her off." John said to him

"Only because she does not want to hear the truth." he Said as he got up and left the two of them alone.

"Those two really should get a clue on the others feelings." John said to Teyla

"Yes, they should, but so should others in their situation." She said as she looked at him

"You were going to tell me something the day Nahani got hurt." John started as he watched the emotions play across her face.

"It was only that I'm glad we've become close friends." she said dodge the bullet for now, but sooner or later she'd have to be honest with him as well as herself.

"So am I." John said knowing that was not what she was going to say, but he let it go for now.


	18. Chpt 18

_**Disclaimer: I own nada in SGA**_

**Chapter Eight Teen**

Nalani was fuming by the time she reached her quarters. She hit the control panel and walked in. The doors swished closed behind her as she plopped down on the her bed. The never of that egotistical ass! All she wanted to do was sit down and have a nice lunch with her friends, but no! He had to be so immature and rude! She let out an aggravated sound as she laid back on the bed. The next thing she heard was her doors opening up. Thinking it was John she just laid there and let out a heavy sigh.

"Look, I know what you're going to say, but I tried to be civil." she snapped" He was being an ass!"

"And you were being stubborn and hard headed." Ronon's voice said to her as she sat up in her bed." Not to mention a bitch."

"You just called me a bitch." she glared at him

"You called me an ass." he countered not really wanting to fight with her, but that was all they seemed to do lately. What happened to how much they loved each other? He knew it had to still be there somewhere beneath all that fear in her.

"Get out." she said to him not wanting to argue with him

"I don't think so." he said firmly as his arms crossed over his chest

"This is my quarters I'm telling you to get out." she restated more firmly. Pissed that he could stand there so calmly when she was pissed.

"We need to talk." he insisted.

"I'm not in the mood to argue with you." she stated not even looking at him as she laid back onto her bed. It was the only way she could not look at him" I really do not have the energy to."

"Neither do I." he said softly as he sat down next to her and touched her knee. It had been so long since they touched.

"Ronon I..." she didn't get to finish what she was about to say because in one quick movement he had her beneath him and his lips were on hers. She knew she shouldn't be kissing him back nor should she be touching him like this, but she missed him so very much. She needed this right now. She'd stop him before it went to far.

Ronon's hand went to her face then her neck then down to her hips. He hadn't intended to kiss her, but when she opened her mouth he couldn't resist the urge. Then the kissing lead to touching. He had missed her so very much and he had vowed not to give up on her. He also knew he couldn't do this now. She needed her space and he  
was happy to give it to her until now. He pulled back and looked into her face.

"You were saying." he said to her as he gave her a smile

"I, um," her brain couldn't think straight. _What was I going to say to him?_' she thought to her self as she looked into his eyes and lost herself. " I believe it was I've missed you and I'm sorry about pushing you away. I got scared and the only thing I thought to do was to push you away." she rested her hand on his cheek.

"I wasn't giving up on you." he told her as he searched her face." I was going to give you all the space you needed, but I couldn't let you go. You some how got into my heart and yeah it scared me, but I'm willing to see where this could go."

"You mean you still want to be with me after the way I acted?" she asked as he leaned his head toward hers and rested his forehead on hers.

"Yeah." he simply said as he kissed her again.

He deepened the kiss as he began to undress her. He paused as he removed each piece of clothing giving her plenty of time to object, but she didn't. She removed his clothes as well. This was more than just sex for them even though neither one of them confessed it out loud this was their way of saying how they felt without using words. They said it with every kiss. With every touch. Every incoherent words mutter in passion expressed their feelings.


	19. Chpt 19

_**Disclaimer: I own nothing and no one in SGA**_

**Chapter Nine Teen**

The next morning Nalani woke up alone with the feeling that her body had been well satisfied. The sound of water running indicated that Ronon was in her shower. She smiled to her self as she got up and went over to her bathroom door. The sound of her doors opening caused her to whirl around. No one stood there, but the doors were wide open. She snatched up a sheet and wrapped it around her naked body. The shower shut off just as the doors shut. She was starring at the doors when the bathroom doors opened up. She jumped as a strong hand touched her shoulder.

"Hey are you okay?" she turned around to see John standing there with a towel around his waist. Her eyes were wide and the expression on her face was one of confusion.

"Um, how did you get in my shower?" she asked as she held the sheet tighter around her body

"Well, I woke up and went to the shower that I believe is our' shower. I stepped in and voila." he said as he kissed her.

"Wait, wait I thought you had feelings for Teyla?" she said confused" And where's Ronon?" she felt like she had just stepped into the twilight zone.

"I don't know who Teyla or Ronon are, but as for my feelings you know they're with you." he said as he looked at her funny." Are you sure you're feeling okay?"

"Yeah, I'm just really not feeling well." she said as she sat down and ran her hands through her hair.

"Why don't you stay here until you feel better." he said as he sat next to her" I'll tell your dad you're sick." he said as he smoothed a hand over her hair" Being pregnant takes a toil on your body."

"Pregnant? Dad?" her head began to hurt as she rested it in her hands. It was then that she noticed a slight 'bump' that was her stomach.

"It's okay I'll stay with you." he said but it sounded like he was far away." We need to go over these things before the big event. Nothing will ever be the same."

Suddenly Nalani woke up sweating. It was dark in her room and the feeling of a heavy arm across her abdominal made her jump to a sitting position. She turned around flicking on a light so she could see the man that was now sitting up looking at her.

"Ronon." she let out a relived breath" I had the craziest dream."

"It was about Sheppard." he stated as she looked at him

"I talk in my sleep?" she questioned

"Just his name, my name and something about a baby." he said

"In the dream me and John were together. My dad was alive and I was having a baby. John didn't know who you and Teyla was. Then he said something about going over Some things before some big event." She leaned against Ronon as he laid back holding her to him.

"It was just a dream nothing more." he said as he kissed the top of her head" You better not go have Sheppard's baby."

"No, I'm not having any babies thank you." she said as she closed her eyes and snuggled into his warmth.

She was still confused as to why she was dreaming about John and babies. She just mentally gave her self a shake as she fell back asleep.


	20. Chpt20

_**Disclaimer: I own Nada.**_

_**Chapter Twenty  
**_  
"Hey, I see you've been using your alarm clock again." Rodney said as He walked in to see Nalani sitting at her desk reading things.

"Um, yeah I find now it's like we're destined to be together." She told him as she flashed him a smile.

"Yes, I too have found alarm clocks to become like my soul mate." He said as he sat next to her. Something was different about he could tell.

"Rodney you're so cute." she said as she shook her head and went back to finishing her work.

"Yeah so I've been told." he said as he looked over at her computer.

"I love working with you." she told him.

"How long have you been here?" he asked

"Only about four hours why?" she questioned as she looked at him

"Why don't you finish up and take a while off. I'll let you know if I need you." he said to her

"Well, if you're sure." she said softly wanting some time to her self anyways.

"Yes, of course I am. I would not have said so if I wasn't." he told her as she stood up.

"Alright I'm going to go find something else to do." she told him as she walked out

She found her self on the far side of the city sitting on an abandoned balcony just staring into the water. As she stood there starring into the water. A soft breeze blew through her hair. This place had become her special place. Somewhere she needed to just breath and relax. She felt more than heard him she didn't even need to turn around.

"I thought you were working." Ronon said as he placed his hands on either side of her against the rail.

"Rodney told me to take the rest of the morning off." she said as he placed his chin on her shoulder. His warmth enveloped her senses.

"You don't have nothing else to do?" he questioned

"Not a thing." she said as she smiled" Got any suggestions?"

"Maybe a few " he said his breath tickling her ear." It's no rush I just want to enjoy this moment."

"I'm not sure what tomorrow will hold, but for right now I'm happy." she said softly as she leaned her head to one side. It felt right being here with him.

"Tomorrow will take care of itself." he said as he watched the water with her. This was one of those moments he wished he save forever. No matter where the next day took them he knew they'd be together. Even if it wasn't in this life. Their souls were connect to each other in way that not even time could separate. Their souls were connected together through everything they had been through together and apart. Life was a circle and theirs had brought them back to each other.

**A/N: **_Well that's it I hope you've all enjoyed this story cause I have. I have a sequal to this, but I have to put some finishing touches to it._


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